Is Your Boss Jealous?
Posted on October 13, 2014 by TNS Consulting Team (via Scott Spayd)
I’m sure there are plenty of us out there who would just love to walk off their jobs due to having a bad manager, and throw something on the way out. Why is that?
When you first started your job, everything was just peachy, and your new boss didn’t show any signs of maleficence. They call this the honeymoon phase. Then little by little the evil leaked out. Your ideas are no good anymore for some reason, you’re overlooked to attend critical meetings, and in general, your boss is treating you as though you have the plague.
You say you’re a rock star when it comes to your job, and always go above and beyond the call of duty, fully engaged in your work and interested in the company business. You’ve already received 2 glowing annual reviews. You’re well-liked by your peers and little birds land on your shoulders in the morning to help you dress. You’re immaculate about your hygiene, and your attire is always fashion plate worthy. When you smile, your bleached white teeth twinkle. So what’s the beef with your boss?
Aside from not be doing your job correctly, is she* jealous of you? Is she afraid you’ll steal her position? Did you say something hurtful without realizing? There could be a lot of reasons why the boss has suddenly turned mean. If you start going home with this on your mind, and begin to worry, it’s high time to ask her what’s wrong.
Schedule a chat time between the two of you to discuss it. If you’re dealing with someone who is truly vindictive, insecure, and lacks leadership skills, you probably are dealing with a jealous boss. If it’s your work that’s the problem, in my view, this boss would be the type who couldn’t wait to tell you where you’re making mistakes. On the other hand, could it be that she is not telling you what your failings are in order to let you fall? Who knows?
One thing’s for sure, you will never know until you hash it out. Trust your perceptions about this boss as to what kind of personality she possesses, and if you feel that a one on one meeting will end up with your words twisted or misinterpreted, then you had better have a third party present, such as an HR rep, another manager, or coworker whom you can trust.
In my working career, I’ve experienced a lot of jealously not from looks but personality. Personality doesn’t grow old by the way. I believe it becomes more profound and refined. But even personality runs a close second to ability, talent. There are those who effortlessly climb the ladders having great business acumen and talent, and just happen to be liked by their superiors are very blessed. Others have a more difficult time and when they finally make it to a higher level, they are very protective against those they sense are a threat.
When I was younger, I never realized this until certain behaviors played out among my peers. I recall a moment sitting with 2 coworkers, Sue and Ellen. Ellen boldly asked Sue if she wanted to come to dinner with her and her boyfriend – right in front of me. I wasn’t that close to Ellen, so I didn’t really feel bad, but Sue was angry and later asked Ellen why she did that. Ellen had no response. A few years later, Ellen and I did become friends, but I think she thought if she couldn’t beat ‘em, she’d join ‘em.
Not having been popular in high school, I picked up speed in my college years by having lots of friends and was in a few college plays. Always having an overdose of personality, I’ve never had trouble meeting people, or starting new jobs. I’ve also mentioned before that I was voted to be an “Employee Forum Delegate” at Fel-Pro for 2 years in a row. The forum met once a month with all the forum delegates who represented the various departments throughout the office and factory, along with upper management where compliments, complaints, questions, etc. could be brought up anonymously or not. Most forum delegates had to be trusted by their fellow co-workers, as well as liked. Much was accomplished by the forum. It was a great privilege to serve on the forum.
As far as a jealous boss is concerned, if it holds true that she has done this to others or is out to besmirch your reputation for whatever reason, it will come out eventually. Bosses like that don’t last long.
*I used the female pronoun in lieu of using he/she-his/her. The manager example applies to both sexes.
Mean Boss Lady courtesy of toonclipart.com